The Beer Tower… I’ll say it again for good measure… BEER TOWER!!
To understand an invention as truly amazing as the Beer Tower you have to understand that it’s a Japanese invention. Yes that’s right the same nation that brought you other revolutionary inventions such as the Samurai Sword, the Toyota Corolla and the Walkman… but lets be honest there hasn’t been much else to compare, until now!
My friends, I am talking about the Beer Tower. I don’t have a picture as yet, but will endeavour to get one as soon as possible. For now you’ll just have to make do with my description.
The first thing that strikes you with the Beer Tower is its sheer size and perfect cylindrical shape. It stands about a metre tall, is clear glass and all class. Protruding from the side near the bottom is a tap, just like those “on tap” style taps in bars. From this tap pours forth pure gold in the form of Monteiths brand beer, made better by the very fact that you are drinking beer from a veritable shrine. Thats right, All Hail Beer Tower!
My description pales in comparison with the experience of being there so you will just have to try it, nay, experience it for yourself!
There is a little unnamed bar/restaurant in a secret location known only to a sacred few. You’ll know you’re in the right place as you enter the bar itself by the overwhelming sensation that you were brought here by powers greater than yourself, that power my dear friends is the Beer Tower’s super secret mystic power.
Again you will have to experience it for yourself but I’ll do my best to let you the unwary traveller in on as much as I can lest you fall casualty to its awesome awesome-ness!
It all began hundreds of years ago when sailors wrought by months at sea, dehydration and a lack of contact with the fairer sex, were thought to jump overboard believing they were is fact leaping in to the arms of beautiful mermaids.
There was one man, one hardy seamaster that could resist its power, he reported to me before he passed on, among other stories, that the sailors were in fact sailing just off the coast of Japan and they had merely sighted the tall stacks of the greatest and as yet unnamed drinking implement ever created by man, we now know it as The Beer Tower.
Be warned.
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